It’s Just A Ladder

First, go read this: Lexi Love

Seriously.

I’ll wait.

Done? Great.

So I finally did it. I’ve been on meds for about a week now. I actually feel a little better. Reading what Lexi had written was actually what pushed me over and made me call my doctor. It just.. made sense. Made it okay, and less scary. I haven’t been on them long but I do feel them working. I’m actually writing reviews because I’m starting to get my sex drive back. My first reaction to anything new isn’t absolute panic anymore, and when it is it isn’t as bad as it has been. If I’ve only been on them a week and it takes a couple weeks to feel them really start working… just how bad had I let this get if I’m already feeling better? That’s what’s really scary now. How far I fell. I’m posting on facebook again which I haven’t in months really. I’m also posting here without feeling anxiety or dread.. or like I need to hide. I have bad days. Always will but it’s better. I’m better. In a week I bump up to 300mg from 150mg (and no, I’m not on prozac. I also wont tell you what I am. Personal choice and there are just too many. I don’t want anybody going out and getting what I have because it works for me, doesn’t mean it will work for you. All individual reactions.) so that’ll probably help even more.

I have had some side affects. I get really nauseous sometimes, especially if I take my pill then don’t eat. Right away. Within like 5 minutes and even then my stomach is a bit floopy all day. I also get dizzy sometimes and I’ve had tension headaches at the base of my neck. A really fun one is my taste buds have changed a bit. I made chilli the other night and apparently it was really hot. I could taste a little heat but most of what I got was the sweetness from the honey I had added to balance the tomato base. So, from now on I have designated taste testers I guess. It’s worth it though. It’s so worth it.

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